When I started this blog, I promised to my self that I would write anything under this sun n above n below it …..but I wont do that …I wont write about love ………and that’s what I did ………….I mean almost 99% of my writing is about that ………….n here I m again writing yet again about the same topic once again …………but I cant really help….this is what I m n I have to write what I m aint it ? I guess so …..!
N today my heart is broken ……….broken once again ………..I really don’t know how it mends itself n yet gets broken again …………….somewhere ages ago …………I read a poem called “If” by Rudyard Kipling ………….n there was a line …………(oooh dammmmm…….I forgot the line ……….no problem .internet mein google hay kis liye ….I will just check out )…….
I will give you the poem at the end …………now get back to my point …….n it is that I broke my heart again ……….:Mon haralo haralo se din ………sono kono ekdin akash batah jure rimjim dekhi “- remember the song by Hemanta Mukherjee………but you see life goes on ……n I would go on too……..its just that there will be one more scar in here ………….n I had to drink those salty waters yet again ……………..
“E kul bhege okul tumi goro jar ekul okul dukul gelo tar lage ki kore o nodi go “ n this song makes me cry n makes me wonder n makes me so sad n makes me feel like dying ………n yet I like this song …….why ? why ? I don’t know there are certain why’s for which I don’t really have any answers , may be the answers are not for me to know ……may be I will get them when I will be very old too old to feel any thing only will have a broken heart …..people say that you grow wiser as you grow ……I think we grow more wiser but we start to feel less…..n you start to think from your head n instead of heart…..which is a good thing …..in one way ……but bad for in so many ways ……..ohhh how youth is wasted in the young ……!
All these things ………..the things that I write now with those salty liquids brimming in my eyes ………..will be read afterwards …..n I will think what a fool I was then ……….so this a document of my foolishness……..proof of my stupidity ……n….why I cried …in fact howled ……..n why was there a painful lump that I so much wanted to throw away……n want to laugh again ……but I cant ……n the letters keep disappearing ……as the keyboard becomes all hazy coz of that god dammmm salty thing that keeps interrupting …..n I don’t know …………may be I should shut up now ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Oooh ! yes ! the poem ………..here it is ………………..
IF
IF you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,But make allowance for their doubting too;If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,Or being hated, don't give way to hating,And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;If you can meet with Triumph and DisasterAnd treat those two impostors just the same;If you can bear to hear the truth you've spokenTwisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,And lose, and start again at your beginningsAnd never breathe a word about your loss;If you can force your heart and nerve and sinewTo serve your turn long after they are gone,And so hold on when there is nothing in youExcept the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,If all men count with you, but none too much;If you can fill the unforgiving minuteWith sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!
