......when the desert turns green ........

So.... Have you ever felt love…………? It's when you felt...like..........something you have never felt before...........you have this feeling............ and that you can't help........... but to notice how her hair is so wonderfully tied up..........and had this irresistible temptation.............. to touch ................to feel the softness ..............and that you wanted to take her number.............but have hesitated a thousand times............ "what if she says no?....."and you employed your friend to take her contact no instead of you ......................And that you went on talking about the most silliest thing on this earth one can ever imagine but couldn't say those things that you have rehearsed at home may be a millionth time.........! And that you originate with the most innovative reasons.............reasons to meet her and to talk to her...............and that would invariably fail to your dismay......... and you feel like your day has been wasted if don't get the chance to see her... and you would sneak around to get a glimpse of her ............... and when you do see her its like your heart starts beating faster........... and you feel that all the blood is rushing up to your face ..............................and that............ when you both are in a group ...........you try not to look at her...and when she is looking at something else............you will take a lightning-fast turn and gaze at her for a split second and again resume looking at something the most ordinary and most uninteresting object in this universe for you .............................!

Now.............if ............any one of the answer is yes ..........then...............or may be while reading it ................if you had a smile in your face............then also.........
........... my dear friend you too have been bitten by the bug...............................! ! !

On a second thought...............love should not always be about a girl................ it should be about the times when you felt happy and felt proud...................! Times when you really felt like that you have achieved something.............. be it your performance in exams..................or when you got your first job or the first salary............... or when you .....for the first time ......told your dad..........."its alright dad , I will pay..............."or may be even when ........you won a match....................or may be bought your very own bike.........................or may be for the first time anybody had appreciated about your photographs like they told"sahi hai"................ or may be your first trek................. Those moments...................those moments are as marvelous, as wonderful, as amazing as falling in love .........................

You must be knowing about flash floods............... even though I haven't seen one, but I have read about, that, when it rains in the distant mountains, the water moves as an overflow and creates a sudden flood in the desert lying in the vicinity........ it may not last more than a few hours..............but within that small amount of time the desert soaks up all its required moisture............and then the nature emerges with its full swing..............and its the time when desert turns green............
If the same is applied to our lives, then, I will have to admit.......... that those small moments of laughter and happiness acts as our own flash floods.................. and if we absorb them with our fullest strength ...................then.......
...... might be......... our deserts will too turn green ...................................! ! !

May be now…now that I m coming to an end I can see a little bit more clearly…..and its now I m getting the reason………. slightly…… …………the reason for me to write this letter….
See… you are my fantasy…
but
to trouble you with my questionnaire about your shadowy side would be extremely selfish on my part …………….
I shouldn't trouble you for the sake of my imagination……................................
esp.……,
if it brings out unpleasant memories……………………………………..

I feel to agree with you that sometimes things are better remained untold if they invoke sadness and bitter feeling…................................................................
it will be really harsh on my part to do that……......…
.its better not to remember the things that doesn't bring a smile to your face…………

"…better by far you should forget and smile,
Than you should remember and be sad……………………………….. "

And thus............................ I felt that it's better to talk about something that brings fond memories………..
The memories that you will like to cherish and enjoy in remembering. ……………Something that surely gives that hint of your dimple……
……...................along with that twinkle in your eyes…………...…..!!!
And that in the end what matters is that whether if you are happy?
And I think that's what should matter the most!






I m just one of them...............! ! !

if I have to give a day like today.......I would give it to you ......

".......and if I have a song ....like this....... I would sing it for you .........."
......and if I m born again I would love to spend it with you once again .......
coz I enjoy being with you ....

.........a smile always comes to my face when ever I think of you ...
.............remembering the times that we spend with each other .......
............and the things that we did together.......

having you was like a backup...coz I knew you would be always there with me .....and would support me in what ever I do ( only when I m right .......or will kick the hell out of me if I m not ) .........and that you never failed to bring out the best in me ......n I never hesitated to try out or do experiments coz I knew you will be there for me even if I fail........ and doing things with you was such a fun ....coz we knew each other so well....it was just like you could read my mind.....and now that I m typing the words... I feel like that you know them already........ n that I m writing things that you too feel for me .......

there was nothing in this planet earth and far beyond .......that we couldn't talk about and that I m yet to find a topic at what we felt any different ....... talking to you was like talking to myself only its aloud.......and it was such a comfort.....just the feeling that someone is there to hold you when you are down and make up for the bad things that happen to you .......it was just great ! and seriously I miss out that feeling........ the things that I do is all the same....yet nothing is same...coz you are not here ......and nothing is same .....!

ooh buddy I miss you so much ........ its not that I m alone yet somehow I always feel lonely ......... I m so lonely without you .... n no one can fill up that space ......... n now that you are gone I miss you even more .....and its only that my heart knows how much I miss you .......may be buddy you will know...no, actually I don't want you to know..... I don't want you to feel bad for me...its just that .......its just that I miss you so much .......and its just for that.....I just wish you were here......that you were here I could talk to you and all my worries would just simply melt away.....just by talking to you .......

when ever I listen to any good piece of music I feel like........
........if.........
.........if I could make you hear it........
...........I always wondered at your exquisite taste in music........something that I never had......

now...that you are gone.....its not the same......nothing is same.....even not me...ya buddy ...I too have changed....may be better for or for worse .....I have changed a lot......its not the same that I used to be .......I really don't know ........but one thing has never changed .... n I hope it never changes......

you were .....you are...everything I always wished to be .........your kindness........your beauty......your gentleness........the grace.......the poise.... you are the most beautiful person I have ever seen ....and what made you even more beautiful was your heart...... and that's a goldmine......ooh hell ...one who stole it is now the owner of the greatest treasure in this world....!

its just I had the time of my life with you ........if I get another chance I would love to spend it with you yet once again..........
.....it seems impossible to write about you ........
I m happy for you yet I feel something is breaking inside me....I wish all the good things in life for you yet I feel there is something missing in my life...........

ohhh.........hell !!!!! its tough !

and I know what the hell I m writing doesnt make any sence...any sence at all......
.....may be I cant ........
............may be ..........
.........and yet again I failed ........
....... yet again my feelings are lost in words !.....